The man in the men’s group walked up to the leader, Jamie Winship, and said, “I don’t believe in all this God speaking garbage. I don’t believe it for a second. The very notion that God speaks.” You might have expected him to end this with a resolute “BAH! HUMBUG!” but he didn’t.
Jamie was nonplussed. He said, “Well, how about you and I and this other man here (a young guy whom Jamie was training up), go into that room there for some privacy and ask God to speak to you and see what happens.”
The man was flustered, “I don’t think you heard me. I said I don’t believe in all this God speaking nonsense.”
“Oh I heard you,” responded Jamie, “but what I am saying is God does speak and does so with or without you believing it. So, what you believe or disbelieve does not matter a bit. If you want, let’s put your question to God for Him to show up to you in a way that you cannot deny.”
The guy agreed so Jamie, he and the other younger man went into the side room. Once there, Jamie said, “Ok. I am just going to open with a simple prayer to silence the voices in your head that you are listening to all the time. The negative self talk. The mean words. I am just going to ask Jesus to silence that, and then I will ask Him to show up to you and you can tell me what you hear. God is going to talk to you, not to us.”
The man was still a bit miffed that Jamie still seemed to believe God would show up.
So Jamie prayed, everyone with eyes open, the man who was confronting Jamie looked intensely into Jamie’s eyes. Jamie said, “Jesus, I just ask you to silence the voices this friend is listening to all the time for now and let him be open to hearing from you. Now, Jesus what would you like to speak to him?”
And they waited.
Jamie asked, “Are you seeing or hearing anything?” The man said, “Well, it’s just stupid.”
Jamie said, “What is it? Say it.” The man said, reluctantly, “I see a door. Just a door and I cannot go through it.”
Jamie and the other young man were so excited. A door? They were thinking how Jesus said He himself was the door (and the gate of the sheep). They were also thinking of Revelations 3:22 in which Jesus says, “I stand at the door and knock and if anyone opens the door I will come in and eat with him and he with Me.” But they didn’t say any of these things for this was about Jesus speaking not them speaking.
Jamie said, “Lord, what else would you like this man to see?”
The man said, “My feet. They are stuck. I cannot get to the door. I cannot move.” “Ok,” said Jamie. He and the other young man again exchanged glances thinking they knew who was holding this man back from movement.
Jamie prayed, again, eyes open: “Jesus, please show our friend why his feet are stuck.”
And, at this, something happened. Suddenly the man became afraid, and closed his eyes, and knelt on the floor and cried out, “It’s Satan. It’s Satan. He is holding my feet.” And this man who was so certain God didn’t speak, was kneeling, eyes closed and crying.
And Jamie and the other guy, got down with him, on each side of the man, hands resting on his back. Jamie said, “It’s ok man. Jesus is speaking to you. You are hearing him. Say it; whatever you need to say.”
And the man was sobbing, “We killed them. We killed two babies. We wanted to keep our careers going. But it was my decision. I wanted them out of the way. And I have felt guilty about it for these 27 years since we did it.”
Two abortions and this man, now in his 60s still feeling such intense, gripping guilt over it. And he is sobbing and sobbing having confessed, “we did this.”
Jamie said, “Just get it out of you.” The man, yelling it, shouting it, sobbing it continued. And they were with him. Then suddenly the man said, “Wait, wait the door is opening! The door is opening! And Jesus is standing there and He, He, He…” he was sobbing again. “He is holding two babies. He has our babies. He is holding them! He has always had them.”
Yelling, shouting, and transformed, this man gave himself to the same Lord who was holding his children. He entered through the door.
This account told by Jamie Winship is a marvelous reminder of the fact that we serve the God who speaks and speaks and speaks. The God who needn’t be carried like mute idols but who is alive (see Isaiah 46). This is the kind of God who makes the lame walk and the blind see and the dead rise. This is the kind of God who is REAL. What a God to serve into this new year. Just do it! Give yourself to him. Happy New Year!